Your worth in a relationship

I don't know if it's me or the person across from me, because I've had this happen with almost every person I've had a close relationship with.

In the beginning, I let the person get too close to me. I show my wounded side, build up trust far too quickly. Too quickly the person means more to me than I do. Too quickly I let everything get too close and sell myself short. That's what a friend told me recently. But I don't know why.

If the person feels bad, I feel bad, if the person is angry, it stings me. I do everything wrong all the time and can't stand being told because it makes me feel worse. The person gets aggressive and would like to take their emotions out on me. And me? I let it happen because I feel so bad. Because I believe the person. Because I surrender and suddenly believe myself what the person is telling me.

But actually it's not like that. Actually, I have to fight against it because I am worth it. Because I am sufficient and enough. Because everyone makes mistakes and everyone is aggressive sometimes.

But when the person manages to manipulate you because you put yourself in the victim position far too quickly. Then- yes, then it's not normal and then both of you have to work on it. You, because you don't know what your true value is and you let everything happen to you. And the other person because they can't deal with you like that.

You are not the only one to blame. The problem lies elsewhere. And it is up to both parties to find out exactly that. Because otherwise a healthy and honest relationship can never develop.

November, 2021